The Pioneer Woman

Hey Guys- did you notice that P-Dub looked at my blog the last time I gave her advice? I was so excited, I told my husband, "The Pioneer Woman looked at my blog!!!!!" He looked at me like, "huh?" "so?" "who's that?" etc. I couldn't get anyone to really care- but I cared. It made my week. :)

This new post of hers -- I just had to respond. My interjections will be in red. :)

PW said:

Aside from the bedrooms, the living room is by far the most UNDERdecorated space in the Lodge. While the much larger kitchen/dining space on the other side of the fireplace is pretty well taken care of, this side is looking pretty sparse. Pretty dull. Pretty blah.
Translation: Help me? Please

From the hallway looking out into the main part of the house, it’s looking pretty good. I’ll be moving that black/tiled piece of art to another location; it’s just parked there for the time being.

But take a few steps forward and turn to the left…and it’s a little bit (i.e. very) drab.
I knew this was an area we’d need to tackle soon, but I’ve been putting it off for a very good reason: I’m completely uninspired when I look at this space. Honestly, I’ve tried…but I couldn’t have fewer ideas for this space if my brain were missing from my skull. Look at this room- - the main problem- balance. The fireplace on the left is some serious visual weight. We need to balance it? When the room is in balance- it will feel "right."

The chair on the other side of the room is new, and up close, it’s really delicious: the leather is weathered and soft, and it’s as comfortable as it can be. I ordered a second one, so that’s coming. The piece of furniture closest to me is also new—Marlboro Man sat in it and instantly fell in love…but unfortunately, it smells like a cow’s bottom.
I’m just being honest. And Marlboro Man and I are pretty easygoing and non-picky when it comes to things like this. But when you sit in a chair and it smells like the inside of a cow’s intestinal tract…well, let’s just say the furniture store was very nice and said they’d be glad to exchange it for something else.

So far we have leather- more leather, and a seriously cool rug- but I feel like we need some more textural variety and pattern. Perhaps a patterned set of round ottomans rather than the coffee table. Some might think that throw pillows are a good idea- but I personally just removed mine from my leather sofa and have them stacked in my master closet. They always fall off the slick leather- they drove me crazy. If they weren't falling off- they were still not staying "in position"- sliding down and just "laying" on the sofa like a dead fish. Yes- they add softness, color, pattern, and texture- but who wants to be driven crazy? Who wants dead fish on their sofa? Maybe you could have some low bolster pillows on the chairs.

The lamp with the “X” is going away—it was just a spare from my house that I threw in there the night we watched the UFC fight.
The question mark on the walls signifies my utter cluelessness as to what to do there. The question mark needs to be something that has such visual weight that it balances the weight of the fireplace. That is what is needed to bring some balance into the room (oh yes- and we also need some plants. :)

So- what could bring balance to the room? Idea #1- A large rug hung on the wall. A really cool one- like this one Nourison's Calvin Klein collection: Shop around. NOTHING is more fun than rug shopping. (I mean that- there is nothing that I would rather do.) Find the perfect one that warms the place up, and gives more visual balance to the room.
Another option? Idea #2- Add visual weight to the opposing wall by changing the wall surface- put a grass cloth on it- (over the entire wall) then add four, 4' mirrors, (in a box shape- not horizontal) like the one below: (from Uttermost- 48" diameter)Another option? Idea #3- Have a custom piece made similar to Crate and Barrel's timber wall art (below is a somewhat lousy picture)- I say have it custom made, because you would need it on a much larger scale. Start with a large canvass, about 60 x 100- paint it a contrasting color to the timber wall art- (It could be brown, gray, green, black- whatever goes with your new ottomans)- hang the timber wall art on top of it. The contrasting canvas beneath will help to add the visual weight you need. Idea #4- I know that you are into photography, and initially mentioned hanging photographs. You could do this if you first- selected photographs that are full of color, (to add visual weight- I fear that sepia tones would be too subtle)- OR- have very heavy frames- with sepia tones in your photos. And second- have them large enough to really be a substantial force on the wall. (keep in mind that we are endeavoring to balance the visual weight of the fireplace). Use a company like Icandy- they can take a photograph, and produce it on a large canvas. You can have one very large one, or a set of 4 or 9. Use the portion of the wall that encompasses our furniture arrangement- just smaller than that area.

I’ve read a handful of suggestions from people who say, “Get the furniture away from the wall!” I’ve never heard of this concept. Please explain. Yes- "Get the furniture away from the wall" is generally good advice, although not always. Lining the walls with furniture gives you what my college professor would call boring negative space- (by boring I mean that it looks like a bowling alley :) and generally speaking is not good design. A better furniture arrangement for your room would be to have two sofas opposite one another. (Can you order one more sofa?) Then add your two chairs in between, as shown- Don't forget your two new upholstered ottomans that will take the place of your coffee table. Also add a couple of tables to the backs of the sofas- two different styles- perhaps one low bookcase style, and one with cool legs. (The one below is from Central Station.) The increased quantity of furniture will also help with our balance problem. Add some lamps to one of them. This is a long space, (awkwardly long) and the current furniture arrangement is accentuating that. You have room for this- I can tell- break it up more- like this: It will look fabulous!
And then…would all of you please decorate this space for me? What goes on the wall? Photographs? If so, how large? How many? What arrangement? I think you would have a hard time achieving a visual weight balance with a collection of photographs- unless done as stated above. Once the cow bottom chair is gone and the matching new chair arrives, what do we need to achieve a good looking/functional furniture arrangement? The leather furniture is more for durability (ranch=stains) than anything else, but how do you wake up leather furniture and add some color? Color is sorely missing from the equation.
This area is stumping me almost as much as the kitchen hood.
I need you.
I need you badly.
Love,

OK- readers- so which if my wall decor ideas do you like the best? (or do you have one of your own?)

#1- large rug hung on the wall

#2- grass cloth and large mirrors

#3- custom made three dimensional wall art

#4- collection of photographs printed on large canvases

Do you think P-Dub will somehow visit my blog again? Do you think she will be hurt that I said her room looked like a bowling alley??? I think she can take it. She is a Pioneer Woman! I can't imagine she will even get to my comment- Her comments were in the 900's when I read her post... She has 4 kids, a bunch of cattle, and a bunch of blogs to keep up with... We shall see. Did I mention that she said she would be my friend? OK- maybe that wasn't it- but she DID say that she would have lunch with me :) (I am comment #1369- my chances are not good :( )

1-24-09- OK- I just had one more thought while I was at the gym today. I really would like a larger area rug that encompassed the new larger seating area. The cool cow hide rug could go on the wall- add some cool hard wired sconces to either side- replace the rug with a much larger one. This will add more softness, pattern, variety, and color to the seating area also. There is something so luxurious about even an "oversized" area rug. My husband would say something like, "We spent $$$ all this $$$ on the hardwood floors, and you are just going to cover them up!" (That is an actual conversation that we had in our last house, and again in this one, except with stone...) Yes. "Yes" is my answer. Especially when the area is open and large. My favorite movie for interior design is "Something's Gotta Give." Go watch that movie, and look at the size of the rug in her great room. (picture below) Are her hardwood floors any less beautiful? Of course not. It is more like a curvy beautiful woman in a lovely high necked dress. You don't have to show it, to show it off.

Look below- I went throught the trouble of changing your yellow stickynote rug to two blue sticky note rugs. :) I'm just kidding- it was no trouble at all. :) But seeing the sticky notes- I like this even better.

P dub- Counter Advice

Ree, are we on a first name basis, can I call you Ree? Which do you think is more informal, P-dub, or Ree? When are we going to do lunch? Do you have any trips to California planned?

OK- your counters- this is what you said:

The kitchen cabinets are in, and Terry and Jerry have put plywood countertops on
them to give us an idea of how they’ll look. We’re still making final decisions
about countertop materials, and since we have a lot of countertop area to cover,
we’re looking for ones that won’t be prohibitively expensive. I’m thinking of
concrete (no color; just naked [but sealed]), butcher’s block, and/or marble,
but not fancy schmancy marble. And maybe galvanized steel. Don’t laugh; we have
it at our farm, and it’s cheap and rather charming.
What counter top
materials am I missing? What’s cool and hip and not typical

My advice?

1. Concrete is not terribly inexpensive, averaging over $100/ square foot where I live. Unless, perhaps, you have a special source. Great look- I would love it in your place.
2. Butcher block- No- too much "wood."
3. Marble... I love the look of marble. At the firm that I worked for down in LA- we were not ALLOWED to use marble in the kitchen because it is too porous. So- great look- LOVE the look- but beware- it would be a shame if it were to stain. I would love a honed limestone... But again- not the most practical of surfaces.
4. Galvanized steel? Interesting. I have not seen it done- but it sounds cool.

   My suggestions:

1. I liked your concrete idea- it is a great look.

2. Slate: Used for centuries to create stylish weather resistant roofs, slate's natural beauty and strength are finding their way into the kitchen. Befitting of a roofing material, slate is durable, hard and fireproof. Luckily, it's beautiful, too, making it a prime choice for homeowners seeking a counter top that will make a statement. Its low absorption rate keeps stains at bay, though you may want to seal regularly to add a further dose of protection.

Soapstone: (picture above) Often referred to as "the original stone counter top," early settlers in New England relied on the durable material for their own counter tops. Far from a high-maintenance top, soapstone's inert nature means acids won't etch the material, and stains can be rubbed out. Mineral oil treatment will bring out a darker, richer color. Make a powerful statement by combining with a soapstone sink.

Quick tip: As you investigate your natural stone options, consider functionality first, then this: do you want a stone that will look brand new 10 years from now, or one that will take on the patina of age? Let your answer help guide your choice.

To clean: Stone is a natural product, and cleaning is fairly simple, though be sure to follow specific instructions for your stone. Monticello Granite, the first nationally available counter top company, recommends that stone surfaces be cleaned with a few drops of a neutral cleaner, stone soap or mild liquid dish washing detergent. Always avoid products containing abrasives, lemon, vinegar or other acids, as well as scouring pads.

Also- consider re-cycled glass- Made of 85% recycled glass- this is "in" because it is "earth-friendly" :). This is also more of an option for a place like P Dub's- because it lends itself to be that juxtaposition of shininess in a rustic interior, whereas true glass is just too modern.

Paper-base- Say sayonara to stone. Richlite’s paper-based countertops provide a durable-as-stone and heat and stain-resistant surface that's more than just a unique countertop alternative. Used in commercial kitchens for years, Richlite is available in six colors including sage, slate black and nutmeg. Using only sustainable materials, Richlite is the first company to offer hemp-based countertops, which are both heat and stain-resistant. Cost: $65-$75.

Personally, I think in a kitchen like the one you are doing, I would do a counter that is not the focal point- something with a dull surface- a simple color- The focal point of the kitchen should be the hood... which I will discuss next time :)

So- anyway... call me :)- we'll do lunch!

P Dub needs me again :)

Dear Pioneer Woman,

Just in case you actually view my blog- know that I have helped you in the past: here and here.

PW is working on another little project that she needs my help with. Currently she has 1010 comments from amateurs. I thought I would add my 2 cents.

PW: When my mother-in-law and I were sketching out this area, she said, “How ’bout if we put a niche right here?” And she pointed to the corner area of the wall.
“YEAH!” I said. “AWESOME! Let’s put a niche right here!”
Then said, “What’s a niche?”
My mother in law laughed, thinking I was kidding.
I wasn’t kidding.
This is a niche, I would later find out:

A niche, technically, is a recess in a wall for a statue or urn. Right now, our niche is holding a pop can.
(Important Note: “Pop” means “Soda“, for those of you who live in California and the Northeastern states; “Coke” for those of you who live in the deep south. Thus endeth this lesson on geographical jargon.)
I like our niche. We installed a light at the top to shine down on whatever statue, urn, or jumbo-sized Precious Moments figurine we decide to put there, and it’s sort of a nice feature for the front entryway.

I’m looking for a few good ideas for the niche, though.

Should we put a big chunk of stone surface at the base of it, and some kind of bronze sculpture on top? Or would a chunky piece of wood be better? Or should we keep it subtle and have a thin, simple surface in there? Should we paint the inside of the niche a contrasting color to the surrounding wall? Should there be shelves in the niche, or should we keep it open as it is? I love your ideas.
And most importantly, how do you pronounced “niche?”
Do you say “nitch“?
Or “neesh“?
I feel the need to settle this important matter before we move onto the next phase.

MY ADVICE:

Dear PW,

I know that you will never read my blog- but I still think we would be good friends, and you should just ask me when you have questions like this :) Did I mention that we both have two girls and two boys? See- we have things in common. We could be friends! I could help you with things like your niche.

Your kids:
My Kids:

You see- they could be friends too- clearly they all like candy (as yours are eating it, and mine are ready to go beg for it.) My kids wish they were cowboys (girls)- your kids are the real deal. They have so much in common- They would get along great!

OK- my advice for your niche:

I like the idea of changing the surface of the niche. Consider bead board, or a mosaic slate. Your area is small- so go for the stuff you wanted in your shower- but cost too much. I told Coleen, in a previous post to use something like this in her niche:

Perhaps a smaller scale in your niche:

That feel would work great in your place as well.

Another idea? You could have stained concrete covering the surface of the niche- with a thick piece of concrete on the base- I don't have a picture of that one for you- but it would look fabuloso!- (and could be any color)

Do not keep the niche the same color as the rest of the walls. If you don't change the surface (which I recommend that you do)- at least change the paint.

Whenever you have a lit area- I would not do shelves unless they were glass, so the light could permeate. On a corner, I would not do glass. It doesn't seem practical with kids and cowboys :)- so I am saying- no shelves.

I like your idea of the jumbo sized precious moments figure (Isn't she funny?)- but if you can't find one big enough...

Finding the right sized item is the most important thing to consider- like a vase from Mattews and Company- their look would be great in your lodge. You mentioned before that you wanted a "zen- like" feel- or maybe that was only for the bathroom- anyway- how about a yoga statue? Oh, you are right- we need more of a vertical feel in your niche. :)These Copper Birch vases from Gumps of SF would be perfect in your place- cut some cool branches, and have them poking out.

I would keep it just like they have it with the glass leaves sitting there- how cool are those? (Gumps again)

Choose both the background of your niche, and your dispay item prior to starting, as you want to make sure you have contrast in the two. If your display item is gray, you might want to go with a gold color in the mosaic- a gray vase, and a gray slate would be far less dramatic.

You could also go with just the right plant- like this Whisper Lady's Slipper Orchid:

OK- there you have it, ignore the gazillion comments from amateurs and just ask me :)

Wallpaper Wednesday

OK- so here I go again, giving advice to the ever popular Pioneer Woman that will never actually visit my site. I feel a little like David Letterman, when Oprah seemed to be ignoring him for so long. (Except that I am more of a peon than David Letterman. - is that how you spell peon?- who knows? And except that it has only been a week :) So anyway- now she is up to 660 responses from people giving her advice- so since she will never actually see my advice- my advice is for you! My loyal readers! Think of this as your laundry room!

Here is Ree's text:

"How would you make this laundry room fabulous? I’m thinking a great color for the washer-dryer: red or chrome or bronze. I’m thinking a rich color on the walls. I’m thinking something cool in terms of cabinetry. Something un-laundry-roomish. Something unexpected."

1. First of all- even though it is "just a laundry room," I would still suggest that the colors and style flow with the rest of the house- in this case- a "zen lodge." Don't break too far from your other colors and feel. Don't go modern, if the rest of the place is rustic- don't go pastel if the rest of the home is muted, etc.
2. Nothing creates an atmosphere like wallpaper- (have I said that before?). So- in a room like your laundry, that is low on the personality scale, add some wallpaper. Washer and dryers, by nature, are not the look of a "rustic zen lodge"- neither is paint- so add your ambiance in paper.
3. I am actually slow to use colors in appliances, for fear that the appliance lasts longer than the color- but hey-- isn't this bronze from Kenmore fabulous?
4. Add some green- this gives the room life- and good feng shui.
5. Good lighting and good organization go without saying- stay halogen, not florescent. Your lighting in your home is not the place to save the earth. I know that is not a politically popular view- but until they REALLY make fluorescent not cast a blue light- I say- stay away. They make skin, food, and yes, cloths, look an off color. They are not flattering, and not soothing. BAD feng shui!
6. Put a Roman shade on the window- this is your only opportunity for softness, so don't use a hard surface. I would do a soft sheer copper-colored relaxed Roman shade with exposed grommets.

Hey Ree- thanks for the post ideas- even if you never look at it, it was still fun for me!

Wallpaper is Ronald Redding.

P Dub needs my help :)

You all know who the Pioneer Woman is -- right? She is the totally famous blogger, (she has one bazillion readers- and I don't even have a site meter- we are on different levels in the bloggosphere) Anyway- we all fell in love with as she told the story of how she and her husband fell in love. She has a section of her blog entitled "Home and Garden" In it, her latest post asked for some help. So- here I am- that's what I do :) Currently, and the number increases every minute or so, she has 919 responses to this request for help. All from amateurs. They are giving lousy advice. And sadly, she will probably never even read my very well thought out, professional, excellent advice. But, once I read her post, I could not, not respond. I just kept thinking about this zen- lodge bath- so here I am, giving advice to the girl who will never see my advice, because by the time I finish this post, she will most likely be over 1000 in her comments, and surely not read them all.- So hey- maybe it will give someone else out there an idea or two on their own bath.

This is her bathroom:

This is what she has chosen for her surfaces:

Some of her feedback said, don't use the travertine in the shower- it will get moldy! People said that over and over- (no- I did not read all 919 comments- not even close- I just scanned and saw it a lot) Personally, I would not worry about it. 1. This is a GUEST house- to me that implies only occasional showers, not 2x / day. 2. Any travertine shower that is cleaned regularly, is not going to get moldy. 3. The large holes are filled with grout. It should not be a problem. You should always have good fans in shower areas- to keep the area from being too humid. 4. Some of the responses said not to use the small tiles on the floor, because of the cleaning issue again. The floor of the shower needs the little tiles to provide the subtle curve in the floor needed for drainage. PW- don't listen to those 919 people who don't know what they are talking about!!!!! If however, you only plan on cleaning your shower once ever two or three months- -- perhaps something less porous would be my suggestion.

Here is a portion of her actual text:

These would be for the shower: the tiny tiles on the floor, the 6 x 6 tile (butted up really close together) on the walls. OK- let me interject here- when you have a tumbled stone, like the 6 x 6 in your photo- you cannot but them up really close, or you have these odd looking corners- you would need a minimum of a 1/4 in ch grout line for it to look right. if you want butted edges, select a stone with square corners.- OK- I will let you continue. I’m drawn to this color range: it’s ultra-neutral, but richer—more khaki—than many of the beigy-off-white tiles I saw. (This is in bright natural light; in the bathroom, it’ll appear darker.)
Now. My thinking is to go with a neutral shower in all the bathrooms, then change the marble/limestone pattern on the different countertops from bathroom to bathroom. Of course, they’re all in the neutral range, too…but I like them:

So here I am—back in the Land of the Neutrals. I want the bathrooms to be calming, soothing, with hints of Zen, but still true to our rural locale. Am I playing it too safe? OK- interjection here again from me- I would say- yes- too safe- Or am I heading in the right direction? Was I right to steer clear of shiny, hotel-style marbles? A variation in texture is good, a little shiny would be great- just not in large quantities. Is it okay to do all the showers in the same materials, then change up the slab patterns on the countertops? Are you talking about more than one bathroom I assume? I am starting to think you should have flown me out for this one. I paint the walls Cyndi Lauper Pink? Should I do a wallpaper border of Scottish plaid and golf clubs as a nod to my country club upbringing?
(Post Script: Not really on the pink and plaid.)
I’d love your thoughts. My mind is shot. I’ve lost the will to make smart choices. “I’m a pool of mushy goo.”
(Name that 80’s movie.)
Thank you…as always.
Love,P-Dub

So- basically- she needs to get her surface material selections to the contractor- Here you go:

This material below, Jerusalem Gold, was the surface that she started with, but disregarded because of it's shininess. I would go with it, but use it honed instead of shiny. This is for your counters.

For your floor, check out the selection below- she was looking for, and I quote her, " It’s supposed to be a lodge. A relaxing, cozy, Zen-like Lodge." What says zen-like lodge more than a black pebble mosaic? Nothing, I tell you, nothing! This is the perfect floor. This will give her a textural variety that is YUMMY!

For the showers- how about the piece below? You can use it on the floor, (this photo is blown up, it is pretty small), and mix it with some larger pieces on the walls, - in about a 16 inch section, bordered with some coordinating stone rope- with large 12 x 12's or 18 x 18's as the main field.

For your walls, it looks like there is not a lot of wall space, but where there is - go with this beautiful paper (below) from the Antonia Vella collection, book, Aviva. OK- stop that! There are a bunch of you saying, "OHHHH- that's too dark!!!!" No it is not. The kids aren't doing their HOMEWORK in there! It is a guest bath! Filled with large mirrors and artificial lighting! This will give it an ambiance that will make you want to never leave! It is perfect. It is fabulous!

Ok- give the selections to the contractor- all of the selections are available through Walker Zanger- available everywhere- even on the frontier! Oh- and Ree- if you do actually read this, I wanted to tell you that your photo on your About Pioneer Woman page is really stunning- in a "makes me want to dye my hair" kind of way :) I am a 36 year old mother of two girls and two boys, living in northern California- I think we should be friends :)